May 28 (day 6)

Saturday

Today we worked in the Epilepsy garden pulling massive roots so the epileptics can use the land to plant and make a means. Most of us girls really just felt useless, but it was nice just playing with the kids or watching the boys do all the hard work. Ha. The Swazi girls were so fun to watch. They have all these hands games that they play and what not and they're just funny:) And all the little ones are just so cute. I just never want to leave them.

The SIFE team will never cease to amaze me. They worked so hard today. They are so passionate about their work. So are our drivers. We didn't hire them to join in and lend a hand but they do. They all show so much love and compassion, and that reflects how dedicated they are to God's will. It's incredible and so encouraging and inspiring. I hope to reflect that throughout my life as well. Even though I felt so useless today, God can still use me in other ways. Andy was telling us that just our presence meant so much to the Swazis, which makes me realize that my whole being should reflect my love for God because nothing goes unnoticed. People see things. The Swazis see how much we want to be alongside them. They are so accepting of us and that is incredibly humbling. It makes me want to be a better person for them.

[Just have to say major props to all those who worked so hard on this day, Swazi and Americans alike. We got the job done for the epileptics and now they can plant and sell their crops!]

The rest of the evening we just hung out and had dinner...Luke, Zeb, Jacob, and Zion came over while their parents went to this dinner thing. They are so ornery! It reminds me of home and how my little brothers play with one another. I guess I do really miss my family, but in no way am I ready to go home!

I've been thinking a lot about something Joe has challenged us with. How am I going to carry over my attitude, thoughts, ideas, actions from Africa to America? It's so easy for us to go on a spiritual high that quickly burns out once we're home. How am I going to take everything I learned here back to the States?
How will I use what I learned to help make a difference?

I've also been thinking a lot about humility....about having nothing but fullness by the Spirit. Being here in Africa is so humbling. It's liberating to not have to worry about everything I have or could have. I think I could live this simply and be happy. But I know once I get back home, I'll go back to the same routine because everything is there around me. I just want to be able to rely on fullness by the Spirit just as many people here do. I want to be able to share everything I have without being selfish and to just put others before myself. I don't want to worry about the vanity of the American lifestyle. We're so selfish in America...If only everyone could live simply...Just something I'm trying to sort through...